Objectify

 A word that stayed in my brain and steep into my soul eversince I learnt of its meaning.

Growing up in a physically and emotionally abusive environment had taught me to be emotionally distant and treat myself like an object and to be useful to others and thus for long, I have felt the burnout and constant tiredness as I ava myself to aid others and not one self.

Though recent years, I had start to take care of myself and follow my heart and do what I love. Constant communication with the one that should shower me with care brings back the traumatic childhood. After all how to be loved by one that grew up without love? But still, I believe years would have taught one to love and see things in a brighter light.

But no, it sadly remains the same.

Not that I am dwelling the past or am about to spiral back to my dark era, its just at times of serenity, I ponder what my life will have turn out if I were just to be in the care of a normal loving family. 

But gone are the years when one is to be loved and cherish. For now, I'm an adult whose childhood was filled with abuse and even till now am asked to forget what had happened. But how could one forgo the times where a child's head was slammed into the wall for the deeds others had done and how could one forgo the times where a child's mind have to be filled with unsupported criticizm and negativity that destroy a young one's self esteem.

"To be strong" one will say, "Okay" the other reply.

Nonchalent my mind stays. 

But for now, Life I appreciate. A life that I built even with all the downs and the ups. For love, I will continue believe, not the love for one but the love for the world and empathy do I still stand for , and empathy shall I display. 

Quarantine Lemonade

When life gives you Lemon and when you are feeling sour & down.

 Squeeze it's juice out and sweeten it up with some sugar and tadah there you have a Refreshing Lemonade to replenish yourself to walk a longer journey.

Making a Lemonade from a Lemon is like a life journey. It have its difficulty but the end result will be satisfying.

You have to start somewhere in life to achieve what you want. Just like making a Lemonade, you have to first cut open the lemon and then you will be able to squeeze the juice and its' essence out. That applies to life too, you have to first open up yourself to truly know what you want and find what motivates you. Then you can squeeze that talent out from your soul and brain and in the meantime remember to add some sweetness in your life by doing what you find enjoyable and rejuvenating.

May this virus be an opportunity to allow you to rethink of your life choices and start doing right and embark on your own journey to reach your ambition.

Turn crisis into opportunity and take this Quarantine period to up-skills yourself in many ways.

Learn that hobby which you always wanted to take up but hasn't always have the time to do so previously. Take online courses to acquire knowledge which you have always wanted to have. Perhaps even attend webinars to understand more of issues which you were always curious or have little understanding of.

You are not alone. We are in this fight together against Covid-19.

In the mean time, Stay safe and Stay Healthy.

Loves,
Jingru